Friday, January 31, 2020

The Lighter Side of Weight Loss: Chapter Thirty-three

The Lighter Side of Weight Loss                                     
By Sandra Warholic Seeley

Chapter Thirty-three

In March of 2019, I hiked (drove) to the top of Gobbler’s Knob in Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania (84 miles northeast of Pittsburgh) to have a heart to heart conversation with our resident groundhog, Phil. This was one month after Phil predicted 6 more weeks of winter, based on observing his own shadow. As you can see, I’m still hiding half of me behind trees, based on the fact that my shadow and I are still only halfway to myWW goal.

I feel like I’m in a “Groundhog Day” movie, repeating the same bad habits over and over again. Either Weather Prophet Phil, who for 132 years has been forced into yearly repetition of weather reporting, has put a curse on me or Phil Collins’ (Bill Murray’s character in the movie) girlfriend cursed me/us also. Either way, there are only two ways to break this cycle. One: close your eyes and spell “Punxsutawney” correctly the first time with no help from Google or Siri. Or two: SPOILER ALERT! DO NOT CONTINUE READING THIS PROFOUND CHAPTER IF YOU WANT TO WATCH “GROUNDHOG DAY” FOR THE FIRST TIME. IT’S FUNNY AND WORTH WATCHING. I repeat ( a la theme of this chapter) or two: an escape from weight related behavioral redundancy is triggered by a character transformation. Phil is finally worthy of his girlfriend’s love (after repeating the same cycle for 33 years and 350 days). Are we finally worthy of self love. Let’s love ourselves enough to vow (officially on February 2, 2020 - Groundhog Day) to stop repeating any self-destructive habits that prevent us from achieving our weight loss goals.

We need to stop overdrawing our smart point bank accounts. This will result in a weight gain penalty. We need to stop making excuses for our own behavior: I’m overeating because I’m angry at …, celebrating …, saddened by …, depressed because of …, you fill in the blanks. I’ve finally come to accept the fact that I am the one responsible for how I react to the above situations. No one is force feeding me junk food or forcing me to overindulge on healthy calories.

During my conversation with Punxsy Phil, he assured me that he did not put any weight related curses on me. He said he has enough trouble dealing with his own problems. He’s terrified of crowds, but still has to make a speech before thousands of people every February. During his off season, he told me he has been studying public speaking. He also has to deal with angry people who do not like his weather report. That’s why he hustles back inside his burrow as fast as rodently possible. And finally, PETA is trying to steal his thunder by replacing him with an animatronic Phil! Come on PETA, no animals were harmed in the making of this weather report. Let Phil continue to be the star of his own show.

Until next week, break your weight loss/weight gain repetitive cycle, be the star of your own show and be happier!

Sandra Warholic Seeley - All my life, and half of someone else's, I have lived in a humorous place called Earth. My muse is a tiny menehune from the island of Oahu in Hawaii where I lived for a year. Ernest Hemingway once sat under the exact same coconut tree where I did most of my writing. I'm also a sensitive to criticism Virgo who loves to get paid for writing and speaking funny stuff. Even though my mind is filled with volcanic ash residue and I'm still finding sand in my shorts, I will continue to write until my muse retires or I run out of pretty blue drinks, whichever comes first. Don't be bashful, email the author.

1 comment:

  1. Wise words. Love this picture of you on Gobbler's Knob! So cute!


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Sandra Warholic Seeley is the creator and author of The Sandra Seeley Column. She is a lifelong educator who has taught in Hawaii, Bethel Park, PA and in the inner city schools of Pittsburgh Public where her passion for the underprivileged began. Her humorous writing is often 95% fiction and 5% fact, leaving the reader to do the math. She has often written as Kanela, which is her Pen Name and means Sandra in Hawaiian. Her serious writing is genuine and written from her heart. She lives in a suburb of Pittsburgh, PA with her husband and Zeus, her 119 pound German Shepherd, who is her constant companion and writing assistant. They have ongoing discussions about which one is Alpha in their pack.

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